Looking back, I laugh at how I used to minimalize myself. I used to think that if I made myself easy to accommodate and not so expensive to please that it would mean men would say “Hey, you’re not like those ridiculous high maintenance types who only want me for my money. You’re down-to-earth and realistic!”
Little did I know that being so low-maintenance d not increase one’s value. In fact, it really lessens your value because you will have sacrificed so much in the name of “not being high maintenance” and still get used, abused, and taken for granted by a man who you only asked for the bare minimum.
Let me repeat that one more time…. You will go into a relationship thinking the bare minimum is all you need and a man will barely do that and still “get away” with taking more from you and leaving you feeling used and bitter because you thought not asking for so much meant he’d at least be consistent with the bare minimum.
You are worthy of giving yourself the high maintenance life treatment as well as expecting it from others. There will be average Adams out here saying they don’t need a woman to do all that or complaining about a woman who won’t settle for an average man. Who wants average in their intimate love lives? Who wants to settle?
Yet so many of us do because we figure it’s the best that’s out there with all the madness. We think that if we can at least get someone to do the bare minimum then that’s the best we could possibly ask for.
I’ve learned firsthand that it’s much better to stay single than to get into a relationship that is mediocre or with someone who is content with staying average and just being average. An average love life is a waste of time in my opinion. It’s not worthy of the time, love, and energy I would naturally give to someone I esteemed as the love of my life and it sure ain’t worth pouring so much into someone only to receive crumbs back.
Stop thinking like an average or basic person. Your worth and how others treat you depend on it. If you want a passionate love life that you’re excited to wake up to each day, then that requires more than just the bare minimum. It requires an intentional, committed higher level of investment that you shouldn’t shy away from.
Nor should you shy away from requiring others to treat you with the same high regard you have been treating yourself with! Please note the distinction here. I said you should already be treating yourself with the high maintenance treatment, not just regarding yourself as worthy of receiving this treatment and only expecting it from everyone else but yourself!
By literally treating yourself how you’d like a man to court and date you, you will be conditioning your subconscious mind to stop wasting time on someone’s potential and require consistent action of replacing the vibe you’ve already clothed yourself in.
This is a major key to your success with living a passionate love life and not accepting the bare minimum as your norm. Change your norm. Change your programming. And get after the love life that’s worthy of your high maintenance.
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