Men are suffering in their dating & love lifestyle.
No different than women, men also have a vision for how they envision the future of their love lives. Men also seek to find happiness and success in long term relationships with a woman and children of their own they hope to raise and leave behind a legacy. But there have been countless issues that have prevent those visions from becoming reality. Men have two options: 1) You can blame all women for why YOU can’t have YOUR dream of a successful, happy relationship in a happy home OR 2) You can DO SOMETHING about it, like all leaders do, and you can go after YOUR goals of finding success and happiness in your love life and building the happy home many of you wish you’d had growing up Here are 5 ways ALMA helps you get from point A, where you’re at currently to point B, where you want to be in your dating and love life with women, a family, and well on your way to securing a healthy, happy home. ALMA FOR MEN: #1 Makes dating fun again. There is absolutely no reason why dating should not be fun. True, dating comes with it’s share of responsibilities and learning curves and it’s not always going to be sunshine and skittles. BUT, this is one area of your life where the good should outweigh the bad. If the good doesn’t outweigh the bad, then it makes no sense to sign up for a lifetime of that dynamic now does it? ALMA will teach you have to navigate the world of women and dating women, so you stop stressing, stop second-guessing, stop doubting yourself. #2 Puts you in control of your love life. I don’t mean as in “you be the leader” men are commonly expected to be in relationships. I mean more you stop feeling helpless and like the future of your love life is outside of your control. You have one advantage in the fact that most women enter into relationships expecting men to lead. The problem is unless you know how to lead that particular woman, she starts to lose respect and trust in your ability to lead altogether. Then things spiral down into the you against me fights that lead to the end of the relationship. ALMA provides you an actual, step-by-step blueprint on how to successfully lead in your love life and with women in a way where you’re not compromising your values, your self-esteem, or other life goals because ALMA will teach you how to align with more of the right type of women that support, not conflict. #3 Helps you make smarter, timely decisions in your love life which = less risks, less wasted time, & less heartbreak. Men get hit harder from heartbreak and often take much longer to recover than women because too many men actively avoid processing and healing from hurt/pain. ALMA helps you make naturally better decisions because we start from the inside out to develop your unique tolerance and risk levels. ALMA helps protect you from going in blind so you stop getting whiplash from dating the wrong types of women. ALMA gives you the choice to choose with the knowledge of what you’re getting into upfront, sooner vs. later. #4 Helps you become more confident in choosing your dating/life partners with my unique step-by-step vetting process AND helps you develop the life skillset to repair your most important & meaningful relationships after conflict. As a leader, nowhere else is it more important for you as a man to lead than in the area of repairing the possibility of lost trust. If there is no trust, there is no healthy relationship and there goes your dreams of being in a happy, successful relationship and raising a family in a happy home. To reach your vision of success in a marriage it’s going to start from the very beginning of how you select the women you date/engage with. That’s exactly what ALMA helps you do. #5 Finally, but by far not the last benefit of signing up for ALMA, the ultimate goal of ALMA is to help more men prepare for achieving their vision of experiencing life/the future with the right life partner. ALMA is the foundational blueprint to help you achieve your love life goals. The best part is I’ve found a way to coach you through this process and making it unique to you and your values. ALMA is not a cookie cutter tool. It’s customizable to where you currently are in your love life & where you want to be one or even six months from now. I want you (men) to stop holding out on hope and a prayer that you’ll someday meet the right woman with the right combination of looks, smarts, and values. I want you (men) to be proactive about reaching your love life goals and to have the knowledge and confidence you need to succeed. No more leaving the future of your love life to chance. It’s time to lead, RIGHT NOW in how you approach the dating process. It’s time to be in control of your love life.
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It’s rare a man or woman gets into a relationship for no good reason at all. In other words, we normally seek a relationship FOR A REASON. Often we may be able to provide most of what we may want in one form or another but it’s be nice to share or experience it with another person whom we feel a special connection with.
As you go through this list consider whether you’d want or need a woman like this. Here are 4 top reasons women “don’t need a man” like this. 1 – Be unavailable more times than you’re actually available. Emotionally, mentally, physically but especially emotionally, mentally, and physically because they’re all connected. The #1 most common best way to teach a woman she don’t need you is to just simply not be there. You’re always too busy. You always make excuses for why you don’t have time. You don’t prioritize spending time connecting with her. You always leave it to her to figure out the logistics of the next date or whatever issue you/your relationship is having currently . . . This is the #1 surefire way she’ll learn real quick how much better off she is not relying on you at all for anything rather than relying on you and continually being disappointed and drained from the effort of trying to include you, but still ending up doing it all alone anyway. Who needs or wants to be in a relationship and still feel like they’re doing it alone/single? Doesn’t make sense or give reason to stay in a relationship with someone like that right? Especially if a person can do all that without it costing them as much time, effort/energy, money, or investment if they were just single or with someone who actually WANTED to be present anyway. Would you want/need a woman who was constantly unavailable? And who treated you as an option? 2 – You are not valued added to her life. You only add stress. You only know how to take from her. You want a woman to be your peace, your nurturer, your supporter, your “ride or die” your “50/50”, your safe space to dump all your emotions and trauma that you’re dealing with, your help when you’re short or having a hard day in life, your mother figure to your child. The list goes on. You’re draining and stressing her and offering very little value if any in return for all you’re asking her to do. This also includes when you’re lack of handling your responsibilities causes her to pick up your slack. You can’t pay your share of the bills, you can’t treat her to nice dates on a fairly consistent basis, you lose your money to additions/bad habits so it jeopardizes the entire household ability to keep lights on, water running, or a roof over heads/car transportation. Would you want/need a woman who mostly just drained you financially, emotionally, mentally? How badly do you need another stressor or liability in your life? 3 – No matter how much she tries to prove to you she cares about you and she loves you, you take it all for granted. You don’t appreciate it. Nothing she does is ever good enough. You keep finding and highlighting the other things she’s not doing. You keep moving the goal post. You keep cheating and looking for “the grass is greener” in other women. You keep testing her limits and boundaries to see how much she’ll let you get away with to keep you. The list goes on. It’s only when she finally leaves or threatens to that you switch up and play the good guy . . . but it only lasts a couple of weeks before you default back to your status quo. In short, you’re not happy with the man you are/you’re not the man you want to be yet and you’re taking that out on her by projecting your feelings of not being good enough/worthy onto someone who is trying to show love. How long would you stay with a woman like this? Do you see yourself growing to love or resent her more each day? 4 – Last, but not least men who abuse women or who haven’t healed/learned to regulate their emotions prove they are more trouble and danger than they are worth. Roughly, 85% of domestic violence victims are women (may include children) and the predator is a male. Men who buy into the controlling of women narrative in order for them to establish “masculinity” are also a part of the problem that prevent women from even feeling safe with men at all. It’s a no-brainer, especially for a woman who has experience domestic violence to have serious second thoughts about trusting a man with her safety and well-being if this has been her past experiences. It has literally become a matter of life and death and it’s simply not a risk she feels is worth taking. Do you look forward to coming home to an abusive partner and/or constantly making up lies to cover it up? Or constantly living in fear of the next moment they’ll snap on you? I want more men to think twice before speaking on or co-signing the red pill podcast on this topic, especially if you or your boys are contributing factors to any of the 4 reasons listed above that only justify why this type of man is not value added in any relationship. Men like this are actively part of the “don’t need a man” campaign and you’re on the wrong side of the equation. I hope this inspires you to be less of this type of person and actively become more of the type of man women DO need, want, and value in intimate relationships. I want more men to start keeping this in mind and start thinking more from a woman’s perspective so you can start to understand women better. As a man, there are certain things you don’t concern yourself with that women often do. None of the 4 reasons inspires a value added woman to sacrifice, invest in, commit to staying with a man who treats her like she’s not even a priority to him or like she’s just another option. The only type of woman who allows a man to treat her poorly like this and stays committed to him is a woman who hasn’t learned her value and is still stuck in a trauma bonding cycle that attracts her to men who mistreat or undervalue her gifts. This means NEITHER you nor her will ever experience a truly healthy relationship together due to it being a trauma bond in the first place. If men are truly concerned about the independent women who “don’t need a man” and you’re trying to prove that theory wrong, then men need to be willing to consistently show their value in relationships by deliver what WOMEN value in relationships, not what men think women value in relationships. How much value added to your dating & overall life would it be if you understood how to find, court, and marry your ideal wife? Ready to learn what it takes to truly succeed with more of the right, healthy woman in relationships so you can realize you vision of success in your dating & love life? Be one of the first 5 men to join ALMA and receive a step-by-step mentorship on how to establish the right foundation to becoming the ideal man most women dream of. Visit the link in my bio or the website https://www.healingissexylife.com/ Men Have a Tendency to Lose a Good Woman, then Want Her Back After She’s Finally DONE with Him2/9/2024 Some of you may be familiar with the saying men and women seem to start on opposite ends of the spectrum. Women usually start off hot with a man they are into, going all in until they’re burnt out. While men tend to move slower and warm up to letting their guard down.
But by the time a man warms up to being the man/leader she’s been begging him to be for the longest, she’s already burnt out and he’s already taught her how to not need him because she was always felt alone in the relationship anyway. A lot of men seem to have this complex where it takes “losing a good thing” to learn the value and appreciate it. Then you’re left trying to find those qualities or that woman in another woman and you’re stuck comparing anyone new to the way someone else did things that wasn’t appreciated. To make matters worse, a lot of men never truly understand why they’re this way or never learn to appreciate a good woman. A lot of men don’t know how to do that, what it looks like, or what it even means. A lot of men think women are desperate. That she’d be so willing to abandon herself and choose being in a situationship with you over having her needs met in a relationship. Unfortunately, there are a lot of women who are willing to abandon themselves just to say they “got a man” at home. Even if he’s not really all there. A lot of men can’t handle when reality hits and when women say they would truly rather live and die alone, rather than continue to self-abandon herself for a man who doesn’t even know how to appreciate how much she cares about him. Let’s talk about the reasons why a lot of men often don’t recognize what they have until it’s gone. If you grew up in a household with emotionally unhealthy/toxic environments then you don’t know what safe love looks or feels like. It will feel foreign to you. It will scare you. You won’t trust it. You will fight it. Abuse it. Not value it. Until you’ve lost it and start comparing it to the lesser quality of “love” you encounter. You never had it and it shows because you don’t know how to value it. You felt entitled. You believed that she was just supposed to always be your source of love, encouragement, positivity, and support. All of that one-sided. While you just did whatever you wanted to do. Barely reciprocating back to her the energy she was bringing. You made excuses “I never asked her to do all that for me.” And you fail to realize that when it’s good love you should never need to ask. But you still took what she freely gave, until she didn’t have any more to give because you weren’t filling her back up. When she grew bitter and lashed out you cluelessly fired back as if this “new attitude” or “new occurrence/change” in her wasn’t something that had been building up over the past few months or years. Wake up cupcake. Get a reality check. The same way Rome wasn’t built in one day, neither are the problems that existed in any of your relationships. But somehow you found a way to make it all her fault that the relationship fell apart and didn’t work out. Your dating strategy is called “too little, too late” aka doing the bare minimum. You can’t seem to know the house is on fire until it’s already near burnt to the ground. Whether you’re too busy exploring options, doing your thing, or overwhelmed with life. You miss all the clear warning bells and signals. You barely contributed to the relationship unless she was nagging or fussing about something and you fiiiiiinally started to call more. You fiiiiiiinally took her out on an actual date instead of just “hanging out”. You fiiiiiiiiiiinally got her the flowers she’d been asking for. You fiiiiiiiiiiiinally did SOMETHING that a man who said he wanted to be in a relationship with her would generally, naturally do. Then you wanted her to be happy with that once-in-a-blue-moon gesture and leave you alone for a while. You expected her to settle and be good without a consistent level of effort showing that you cared. You don’t understand women or relationships. This is the result of lack of knowledge, entitlement, and poor role models. Social conditioning has made it easy for men to move about this way. You see it every time there’s a #metoo incident. You see it in the poor communication exchanges between men and women. You see it when men blame the women who are bad actors for why they treat ALL women poorly or the same way. If you’re set on moving though life not appreciating the value of a woman who is jumping through hoops to show she loves you and you can’t see it until she’s burnt out and moving on, you need to heal. You need to leave the good women alone and take care of what you got going on in-house first. Otherwise it doesn’t matter if you’re dating a toxic woman or a good woman. YOU are the one who won’t know how to deal and you’ll end up losing both because you’re toxic. Relationships always take two. Any number of these will keep you stuck miserably single or miserably floating from one relationship to the next. Ready to break the cycle? ALMA for men https://www.healingissexylife.com/alma-for-men.html#/ This video is to help those who are struggling with unaddressed trauma to better understand how it’s going to prevent you from being able to sustain a healthy relationship with your life partner. Please get the help you need to heal your trauma. You can find more resources in my blog and store by visiting
Register for A Lady's Man Academy (ALMA): https://www.healingissexylife.com/store/p34/aladysmanacademy.html Register for Decoding Men 101 Bootcamp: https://www.healingissexylife.com/store/p20/decodingmenbootcamp.html Visit HIS Lifestyle Blog (free game): https://www.healingissexylife.com/lifestyle.html HIS Weekly Newsletter (also free game): https://www.healingissexylife.com/subscribe.html Here are the top 3 things you can expect if you’re considering becoming a client and hiring a matchmaker.
Register for A Lady's Man Academy (ALMA): https://www.healingissexylife.com/store/p34/aladysmanacademy.html Register for Decoding Men 101 Bootcamp: https://www.healingissexylife.com/store/p20/decodingmenbootcamp.html Visit HIS Lifestyle Blog (free game): https://www.healingissexylife.com/lifestyle.html HIS Weekly Newsletter (also free game): https://www.healingissexylife.com/subscribe.html I wanted to provide a more in-depth video breaking down 4 alternatives to regular talk therapy. Often, your path to healing will involve a combination and finding the right balance from various forms of therapy. Don't be afraid to explore and learn more about what works best for you!
Hey, HIS fam! So today, we’re talking about things to know before you book that first (or next) solo trip. Here are some insights I wish I’d have known sooner and I hope they help you too!
If you found today's blog helpful, please drop a comment below and let me know! Also, any good group touring companies you've experienced and where did you go? We only get one life. The sooner you set boundaries and start living life on your terms the sooner you’ll enjoy a fulfilling life of purpose. Let’s dive on!
Many of us have never truly stopped and asked ourselves about our beliefs or why we do the things we do. Whether it’s tradition, religion, or just how we live life, the career path we choose, the schools or clubs we join. . .
Are we really doing those things because we discovered it on our own for ourselves? Or did we pick it up from our family, friends, and community and just keep going with the flow because that’s what everyone else was doing and how we were raised? As human beings we are creatures of social interaction and any time a member tries to question what the majority does they are often “silenced” in effort to protect the way things are. In today’s video, I’d like to challenge you to look inward and challenge any notions or beliefs you may have held onto about yourself from your childhood. You’re not truly living life if you still carry unaddressed trauma around. It just keeps you stuck living in the past instead of being excited for what the future brings.
In this video we cover reparenting yourself and the 5 steps I used to start my self-healing journey. Heal your trauma. |
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